Germs. Bleurgh!

Yesterday was our macmillan coffee morning day at work. I was all set to be good, I had great intentions. I would be good all day and I would do my long run Friday and all would be well. Then Thursday actually happened.

It started with a 4am bed invader, in the form of my small human. I dozed for half an hour on and off with her fidgeting about and in the end gave up and got up with her at 4.30. I was not happy. We got downstairs and I looked at my phone. I had news, and I didn't like that either. I had been waiting to hear about a colleague of mine. I would say we are pretty close, she sits next to me at work and we have a good friendship. She has been poorly for a couple of weeks and in hospital having various tests. Well the C word has now been said. That horrible bastard word. I felt sick. I got all emotional. I had to go into work and tell the rest of my team. People were upset, it was horrible. I just didn't feel right at all, I assumed it was shock perhaps.

Out came the cakes. And oh my....there were SO MANY!!! Well with such a bad start to the day, how could I resist? I hadn't had any breakfast yet. I put my fiver in the box and had a lovely muffin for breakfast, thinking to myself, with a fiver I can have seconds actually. Fuck it! Oh, but no. Life had other plans. I suddenly felt a cold sweat come over me. Before I knew it, that muffin was reappearing. Honestly I hadn't even been able to enjoy the post cake glow for five minutes. How rude is that?! Well that was me off cake the rest of the day, that's for sure. Stupid sugary delicious bastards.

In light of this, plus the realisation I hadn't taken the precooked chilli I had frozen out of the freezer for tea, I decided there was no harm in buying some cakes for my partner. I wouldn't want to eat any now, he would be less pissed off that he had nowt for tea if I handed him cakes to soften the blow, and I would be donating more money to a great cause (even more poignant in light of the mornings news). Win win. Except no. Because this day was basically becoming a farce, this didn't work out either. Because I couldn't find my bank cards. I have a separate cash purse and card holder. And my card holder was nowhere to be found. Shitting hell! By this point I felt like I was going to pass out or cry, or both. So, I left work and went home. It wasn't even 10am and the day had beaten me. By the time I got home I was shivering and sweating. My whole body was aching. Like, even my eyelashes.

I got in the house and thankfully found my cardholder (again my delightful little cherub had been rifling through my things no doubt. Probably looking for my phone to watch those bloody shitty youtube videos of people opening kinder eggs that she seems to love!). So one thing worked out. I took myself off to bed where I think I went through every range of temperature known to man. I took a lot of codeine and paracetamol and I slept. Needless to say, I did not get up and go for a run today. Not a chance. Im a little better but not in any fit state to exert myself.

I dont work fridays, and little legs doesnt go to nursery on fridays. So, I have survived the day by allowing her to paint my nails and colour my feet in. Just for some peace. I will try and attach pictures of this handywork, as its impressive. (pahahahahaha).

Tomorrow is weigh in and I dont know what to expect. Im ill. Ive not eaten properly last two days. Ive missed a run. And I feel like crap. Well. We shall see eh?

What is a proper runner?

What IS a proper runner?

This is the question I have been asking myself today. After my 5 miler on Friday, and this morning I got another 4 under my belt before work, I had said that I feel like a proper runner now. I am running 3 days a week, I am increasing my distances gradually. I subscribe to womens running. I have technical running clothing and shoes. I have post run recovery protein, and I have electrolyte tablets to put in my water for longer runs (Friday was the first time I used them, and I think they definitely helped – I think I will use them on my Friday runs from now on, when I am focusing on increasing distance and endurance). I have signed up to a half marathon, so I have a decent goal to aim for. I feel like a proper runner.

But, another lady I know who started running earlier this year (who was the inspiration for me getting back out there in fact) said she has only just started to class herself as a proper runner since yesterday, when she completed her second half marathon. Hmmm.  Interesting. So, what IS a proper runner then? I don’t go to a running club, because I like to run on my own. I enjoy the solitude and that time alone, where I don’t have to think about anyone else for a bit, just my own thoughts, my music and my breathing. I am not following a specific training plan at the moment either, having completed couch to 5k I am working up to 10k on my own, which I am confident I will reach in the not too distant future.  I haven’t signed up for any other events either. I know a lot of runners sign up for multiple events. I haven’t done that. I have one other in mind, but a lot of the events near me are charity events, and as I have taken a charity place in GNR, which has a minimum fundraising target of £300, I don’t want to push my luck with people asking them to sponsor me for other things or risk not hitting my target because people HAVE sponsored me for other things.

I have thought about looking at events where they maybe aren’t just for a specific charity and  I could tag them onto my existing Just giving page, and run more than one race for the same charity, not sure if thats an option. Anyway, I digress – do you have to be competing in loads of events to be a proper runner? I’m not sure you do ya know. I think if you do it week in week out, and you progress and then maintain a level of fitness, then you are a runner. I don’t think it is defined by what events you do. People may run simply for fitness and never enter a race in their lives. They are still runners. Well, in my eyes they are anyway.  So, I hereby declare myself a proper runner. So there! Haha.

Another weekend, another weigh in.

Yesterday was my longer run day. Last time I went out on a Friday was 2 weeks ago and I managed 4.15 miles. I mapped myself a 5 mile route and decided to try and do as much as I can of it and see where we get. Well, I only bloody did it! 5.25 miles in total, in about an hour and ten minutes, which is slower than most but I don't care. I ran over 5 miles! Me! I'm starting to feel optimistic, I have nearly a year and I reckon I have a good shot at this half marathon. My original aim when I started running in June was to be Up to 5 miles by Christmas, so now I'm upping that to 6. If I can get to that from nothing in 6 months, I can up that to 13 in 9, surely. 

Today was weigh in. I have been good all week bar Sunday when we had Sunday lunch out. Which was mainly ok but I had a Yorkshire pudding and a bit of cauliflower cheese and 2 little pigs in blankets which were not so good but other than that I've been on plan. I upped my running this week on all 3 days compared to usual. And I maintained. I am a little disappointed but I know that it happens. I also did my measurements and I have lost loads of centimetres even if the scales haven't budged this week. In September so far I have lost 9cm around my belly alone! I think 4 off my hips, 2 from my bust and 2 from my waist. So, I'm happy with that.

I've had a tough day, had to go to a kids party (avoided nibbling on any party food) and my OH is away this weekend so I'm on my own and the small one is going through a challenging stage too, but the day is almost done and tomorrow is a new day. I have meals planned all week. No social engagements. I can do this. It's my birthday in just over 2 weeks so next week will be my last weigh in as a 37 year old, as the weekend after I'm away. For my birthday I'm going on a girly weekend and I can't wait. Yes it's not going to be ideal diet wise but I'm trying to be as good as possible food wise, and just enjoy a big old drink haha. Going to try and get lots of running in before and after. My birthday is a Monday and we come back Sunday night. I usually run on a Monday so I may have a birthday run. We shall see. I want to, I guess it depends how alive I feel after a heavy weekend. 

I should probably start adding some other stuff in on non running days. I'll look at options. Any suggestions welcome! Thanks for reading xxx

Bit of extra motivation

Hello and happy Wednesday! This morning I did 3.5 miles before work and I was really chuffed with myself. I have been doing 2.5 on a Monday and Wednesday but upped it to 3. I was awake earlier this morning so I decided to use the extra time to get some extra distance in. I hope I can do a decent run Friday now too!

Tonight I am off to the cinema to see the new Bridget Jones movie. I’m really looking forward to it. I love going to the cinema, and go regularly if I can. This will be the first Bridget movie I have seen without having read the book first! I don’t think there is a book of this one, as the book that recently came out (I say recently, it was nearly 3 years ago haha) was not the same storyline as that of the movie. So no idea what to expect.

Last night I decided to have a look through the two suitcases of clothes my dad dropped off for me the other week. These are all my clothes, not just some random lost luggage he picked up cheap, don’t worry. Basically, just over 4 years ago I had called off my wedding. Things had gone sour and I knew we couldn’t get married as it wouldn’t be right. So, that was that. In the 2 years running up to the wedding, I had been secretly squirreling away some cash, into one of those terramundi pots that you have to smash open to get the money out of. I used to put every £2 coin into it, plus the odd fiver if I ever felt flush. It was a honeymoon fund, meant to be a surprise for my husband to be. Well, once the wedding was off, I decided bugger this, Im opening that. I had over £800 in it. So, I booked myself a weekend away in Belfast with some lovely (crazy) ladies (you know who you are) and with the rest, I had several shopping sprees.

This led to an accumulation of new clothes, mainly dresses. My wardrobe had never been so full! During this time, I met my now partner. I was in the process of giving up my flat, as I couldn’t afford it on my own any more, and I had arranged to rent my friends spare room for a bit, and then as my mam had died, I decided to move back in with my dad. I packed up these two suitcases of clothes and sent them over. Then I started packing other things and getting prepared to move. Just before D day, I found out I was pregnant. This led to a swift change of plan, and I was suddenly moving in with my boyfriend (this was always on the cards, we had just decided to wait a bit, but that went out the window).

I forgot about those suitcases of clothes. After all my mind was taken up with other things, and maternity clothes were purchased anyway. My daughter is now 2 and a half and my dad must have finally got sick of harbouring my stuff and brought them to my house for me. Last night I went through them briefly and OH MY! I had forgotten most of this stuff existed. Lots of the items still have tags on, and the rest have only been worn once or twice. So, here is my fresh bout of motivation! I have a skinny (well slimmer, maybe not skinny) wardrobe ready and waiting for me! Most of it is still current, nothing seems to be massively ‘out of fashion’ so its all good! I cant wait to fit back into them! 

New week, new plans

Its Monday once again and here begins a new week. I don’t really do exercise on weekends. I know this is likely to change as I need to increase my running time to train, as I will need to have more time at least once a week but for now, I am happy with Monday Wednesday and Friday as run days. It’s what I have always been used to. I may increase to 4 days at some point but not yet.

I am well prepped food wise this week, I have tonight’s tea in the slow cooker (giving this diet coke chicken a go for the first time ever), I have premade lasagnes and shepherds pies for Tuesday and Wednesday and I am having tea out Thursday (nandos, so I know what i can have from there to stay on track, it’s all good). At the weekend it’s just me and my baba for 3 days. My other half is going away on a golfing break from Friday morning to Sunday evening. We have a couple of things planned (kids party and we are going to the theatre to see stick man live) and I will probably do online food shopping this week too as won’t have a car with him being away. I’m kinda excited to try some different things. How sad am I? Haha.

I did a three mile run this  morning which I am pleased with, the back held up ok and fingers crossed it stays that way (caring for a toddler for 3 days on your own with a bad back is not fun, I can promise you that). I’ll do another one Wednesday and then hopefully Friday I will do a longer run. I’m at the cinema Wednesday night and out for tea thurs as I mentioned above, so I think the longer run will be necessary. I’m going to see the new Bridget Jones movie, but I am going to try and be good and maybe take grapes and a small bag of skinny popcorn rather than splurge on the movie stuff which is really bad.

I have some time off coming up soon and I cant wait. I always take a few days off for my birthday and this year is no exception. I start my week off with a hospital appointment for the little lady, which I hope goes alright. Then I am going away for 2 nights with the girls to Blackpool, to celebrate. We are booking a booth at the Funny Girls venue to watch their Halloween spectacular, then a few drinks somewhere and I think we will also squeeze in madame Tussauds. I haven’t been to blackpool for a while – I know that its reputation has gone downhill but I think for a daft weekend with the girls it will be perfect. I went for a day there last year and it was still fine. I think people maybe exaggerate things, it sounded like scenes from Ibiza uncovered when I was reading about it recently and it was nothing like that! I get back from there on the Sunday evening and Monday is my birthday. Nothing planned for the actual day yet. Will see if the mister pulls anything out of the bag. Monday is a run day though. So I may have a birthday run. Or I may give myself the day off. I shall see.

Weekend musings

I've spent the weekend resting my back and stinking of deep heat in an attempt to heal. And I'm very pleased to report that it feels a heck of a lot better. I'm contemplating a run tomorrow morning. I've set my alarm anyway and will see how I feel. I've new stuff to try out so I'm eager to get out there.

I went to my slimming world group and I've lost 2lb this week which I'm pleased with considering I'm a run short of my usual routine. I seem to be averaging 2lb a week which is good enough for me. Carry on at that rate and I can shift 2 more stones by Christmas.

Today we took the small human to massive toy shop and said she could choose whatever she wanted as long as it added up to £50. She did well, there was a sale on and for a 2 and a half year old she was pretty savvy with her choices and got loads!

We had Sunday lunch out as a treat and it was delicious. I'm still quite full so I'm just going to have some skinny popcorn while watching TV in a bit rather than have a proper tea as I'd just be eating for the sake of it.

I've been thinking about what it is that's different this time than all the other attempts at losing weight since I had the baba. Ive never stuck to it this long before. I think its a combo of attending a group again and running. I kid myself when I weigh at home. I don't weigh when I've had a bad week and our floors are uneven so the scales aren't accurate. And exercise wise, nothing else motivated me to carry on every week like running when I did it last time and the same is true now. I join gyms and I go but I don't really like them, and I seem to go sporadically rather than on set days like I do now.

I think my heads in the right place finally and I'm excited!

Bloody stupid body.

I was all geared up to do a long run today, and then my back decided it has other ideas and went on me last night. So no run this morning. Especially as a thunderstorm was raging when my alarm went off. I'm disappointed. I can't lie. But there's always tomorrow. And if not, next week is a new week.

I received my new water bottle today with some electrolyte tablets. I'm gonna start using them as I remember they minimised cramps and aches when I was running before so every little helps. No calories either so no syns. I think I need to incorporate some core strengthening into my rest days (well Tuesday and Thursday, not weekends) and that will help too.

I have heat patches and wine to see me through the weekend, I'll be fine!

Fundraising has officially begun!

Holy crap! I have my first sponsor. Shit got real. Woooo!

I set up my just giving page last night just because I like to be organised. I didn’t really think about fundraising just yet as most people have probably just paid up for the people they sponsored in this years GNR but I shared it anyway just so it was out there. And a lovely lady has sponsored me £5. So, thats it now, its really real. Wow. I spent last night looking at winter running kit, as I don’t want to slack off during the cold weather (ok maybe snow will stop me but cold, wind and rain will not). I ordered some stuff online ready.

I have had a funny week diet wise this week. I have been pretty good, but we were at a christening on Sunday and buffet food was involved. I didn’t go mad but there wasn’t much that was slimming world friendly. In fact the only thing that was SW friendly were chicken drumsticks, and I am such a weirdo I cant eat meat off the bone like that, so I avoided them. My group leader says that over the course of a week, you have approximately 21 meals. If 1 meal out of that 21 isnt on track, but the other 20 are then there is no reason why you should not still have a good result. I know this makes sense but I also know my body is a right little sod about these things and I am not usually able to get away with even one off track meal. I guess we will see on Saturday. I have been for two runs this week, one slightly longer than usual and tomorrow will be my longer run (last week was 4.15 miles, Im going to aim for 4.25 this week).  My aim has been to get to 5 miles before Christmas and I think I am well on track to do that. Then I have 9 months to up that by another 8 – waaah!

Had a chat with a friend this morning on the way to work about online dating. Anyone who remembers my old blog will recall the horror stories I have from those days. Its not all bad though, I have a wonderful partner and daughter now thanks to online dating. But, my word it is hard work. I think I have decided that should I find myself single again, I shall stay that way.

Thanks for reading xx

And so it starts

Well this morning saw my first ‘training run’. Its not really a training run, as I was already running 3 times a week and I haven’t devised a training program yet, but I did get up 15 minutes earlier than usual to increase my distance to 3 miles before work, rather than 2.5.

I saw a guy walking his dog while was out running and he looked at me with such contempt. I see him now and then and he always does this. I know Im fat and I don’t look like a runner. That doesn’t mean I am not allowed to do it. There is no need to look with such distaste. Perhaps he just has resting bitch face though, and its not me at all, he just always looks like a smacked arse.

I feel I should elaborate on my background a bit more while its early days. I have never really been a sporty person. I hated PE at school, especially cross country running. I mainly walked the two miles they made us do.  I have always been overweight to varying degrees. This time ten years ago, I had just come home from hospital having had surgery on my spine following a car crash that eventually led to me being housebound for the best part of a year and a half. I could barely walk. I couldn’t straighten up. I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t stand and cook a meal. I had to crawl up my stairs. The surgery gave my my life back. And I decided I wasn’t going to waste it any more.

It took me a long time, I started off using wii fit. I don’t know if anyone has ever used that, but it isn’t really vigorous exercise. Its quite gentle and was just what I needed to ease myself in. I then branched out to some more workout DVD style wii games, Biggest loser workout game was one of them, and there was a personal trainer sort of thing. That was a decent workout. That got me used to some more exercises. Then I joined the gym and I used to go 3 times a week. Still nothing ridiculous. 15 min on a treadmill (walking) 15 on a bike and 15 on a rower.  Over the 12 months this took place, I lost almost 7 stone.  I followed weightwatchers and did this exercise and it worked for me. Then I signed up for a race for life. I had walked one the year before and I decided I would like to try and run it. So, I embarked upon the couch to 5k plan. I didn’t lose a lot of weight but inches melted away. I did my race for life and then I carried on with it. I was running 4 times a week between 3 and 6 miles a time. I had never felt so fit! And then my mam became ill. Everything went by the wayside while she was dying. I don’t regret that, I would do the same again. She was all that mattered to me for those weeks. I did intend to get back to it. I really did. But grief enveloped me. It still does to be honest. But its more manageable now.  Only a few months after my mam died, I found out I was pregnant. So that cemented the end of my fitness regime for a while, due to severe morning sickness and then pelvic displacement.

So now I find myself kinda back where I started although not quite. I started couch to 5k again on 3rd June. And here we are. I would welcome any tips if anyone reads this. All advice appreciated as I have no idea what I am doing x

Welcome!

Hello. Welcome to my life for the next 12 months. I am 38 in a couple of weeks time, and I have just signed up for my first ever half marathon. Ive done a couple of 5km runs before for charity and an abseil but nothing like this. So, why? Well, I don’t really know the answer to that.

I started running a few years ago and had got from nothing to 6 miles by the time I stopped due to pregnancy. I had lost quite a lot of chubb from it as well, which I have basically put back on now. My daughter is 2 and a half, and I have been fannying about losing the same few pounds ever since, and enough is enough! I remembered what worked for me before, and it was running combined with watching what I eat. I used to do weight watchers but they have changed the plan and I just cant get away with it so I decided to go to the dark side. Yes thats right, I went to (looks around to make sure nobody overhears this horrific confession....) slimming world. So, in June I started couch to 5k again, from day 1. Runs of 1 minute duration. MY GOD it hurt. I couldn’t believe how unfit I had become. I could have cried. But I didn’t. I got up again 2 days later and did it again. And so on....and then on the 1st August I joined slimming world. And carried on with the last couple of weeks of C25K and graduated, and have continued running 3 times a week. I do two 2.5-3 mile runs a week on a Monday and Wednesday morning, and on a Friday when I don’t have to go to work I have been increasing a little each week. Last Friday I did 4.15 miles. I have lost 13lb in six weeks. I like these results.

A lot of people I know ran the great north run on Sunday. I loved seeing their updates on facebook, and I was a bit jealous, I wished I could run that far. Then I thought, who says I cant? Ive gone from nothing to over 4 miles in 3 months.  I have another year till the next great north run. I could give it a shot. And think how much fitter I will get in the process? My arse may finally no longer require its own postcode. It could end up just a normal sized arse. Imagine!

Then comes the charity bit. I fundraise every year, and have done for the last ten years or so. I choose a different cause every year and I do vary the method. But I lost my mam 3 and a half years ago to skin cancer and breast cancer, so cancer charities are very close to my heart. I saw Breast cancer care were offering early bird places this morning and it felt like it was meant to be. So, I did it. And now Im crapping myself but excited too. This would be my greatest achievement with the exception of my beautiful daughter. I know my mam will be proud up there.

I have decided to write this blog for the journey over the next 12 months to keep a record of how training is going and how Im getting on. But I cant lie, I deviate and go off topic CONSTANTLY in real life so that is totally going to happen here. Sorry (not sorry).

Thanks for reading!
H xx